I’m A White Ally

A poem by Dash MacIntyre about political correctness in a grocery store.

Dash MacIntyre
2 min readJan 19, 2023
Photo by Pars Sahin on Unsplash

An old morose obese white lady in a motorized scooter

controlled by grandma-winged arms passed by me in Walmart

and pointed out the people of color

and said to me there’s too many n****** around

so I told her she couldn’t use that word

and she looked surprised I wasn’t on her side

and told me not to care about all that political correctness baloney

so I said okay

there’s too many shit life syndromed racist hillbilly bigots

like you around raising up our healthcare costs

with your life’s hedonistic approach to trans fat

cigarettes guns and opioids

you’re what there’s too much around of

not some random black people just existing with black skin

and she looked at me horrified

and opened her mouth to scold me

so I told her to shut her meth mouth

and all its political correctness baloney…

maybe she had an aneurysm

because she got quiet babbling something to herself

and I said it appeared she actually quite liked the conveniences

of casual political correctness

and she huffed and turned her head

and her scooter slowly motored away.

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Dash MacIntyre
Dash MacIntyre

Written by Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.

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