Breweries Across The US Are Mocking Trump With Their Beer Names

Which beer would you like to order from the bar?

Photo by Brad on Unsplash

These are the top beers named after Donald Trump’s personal repulsiveness, criminality, and presidential incompetence:

• “Lock Him Up Lager” (San Francisco, CA)
• “Diaper Don Dunkel” (Chicago, IL)
• “Impeached Imperial Ale” (Tulsa, OK)
• “Epstein’s Best Bud Kölsch” (Philadelphia, PA)
• “Smells-Like-S*** Saison” (Denver, CO)
• “Golden Shower Wheat Beer” (Buffalo, NY)
• “Halfwit Hefeweizen” (Harrisburg, PA)
• “Incest Blonde Ale” (Phoenix, AZ)
• “Rapey Don Rye Ale” (Miami, FL)
• “In-Two-Weeks Porter” (Kansas City, MO)
• “With Tears In Their Eyes Pale Ale” (Springfield, IL)
• “Convict In The White House Pale Ale” (Milwaukee, MI)
• “Poopy Pants Sour Beer” (Palm Springs, CA)
• “Bankrupt Cream Ale” (Washington D.C.)
• “Twice Impeached Double IPA” (Minneapolis, MN)
• “Popular-Vote-Loser Triple IPA”
• “Two-Time Popular Vote Loser Witbier” (Seattle, WA)
• “Felon Malt Liquor” (Madison, WI)
• “Fake Hair Helles” (Topeka, KS)
• “Dotard Dunkler Bock” (St. Louis, MO)
• “Mushroom Maibock” (Las Vegas, NV)
• “Mango Mussolini Maibock” (Cleveland, OH)
• “His Flatulency Brown Ale” (Pittsburgh, PA)
• “Past Your Jail Time Ale” (New Orleans, LA)
• “Mein Trumpf Lite” (Los Angeles, CA)
• “Tiny Hands Ice” (Portland, OR)
• “Cult 45 Malt Liquor” (New York City, NY)
• “Putin’s Bitch Triple IPA” (Boston, MA)
• “UV Wand Up Your Butt Belgian Blonde” (Little Rock, AR) 🥃

I might be the most relentless satirist of Donald Trump, Elon Musk, and the MAGA movement on the Internet, so if you like my comedy here’s a 50% discount on paid subscriptions to help support me, for just $2.50 a month, tirelessly fight back against Donald Trump’s fascism with comedy.

☕ Enjoy my comedy and political commentary? Buy me a coffee!

But first subscribe to my free Substack The Halfway Café to get my work delivered right to your inbox. In this second Trump Era of surrealist governance, nothing is more important than comedy, so consider becoming a paid member to help support me tirelessly mocking Trump and his MAGA movement.

Because our social media platforms are being scrambled up by oligarchs, if you like my comedy, diversify where you follow me so you never miss my jokes to interrupt your doomscrolling: Twitter, Bluesky, Threads, Facebook, Instagram, Spoutible, Medium, and Substack.

If you think Donald Trump is a joke, I published the book for you: “Satire In The Trump Years: The Best Of The Halfway Post,” available on Barnes & Noble and Amazon. I’ve also published three existentialist poetry books for Millennials, Cabaret No Stare, Moon Goon, and Hotel Golden Hours available in print and on Kindle.

Browse my comedy portfolio, my Dada News portfolio, and my poetry portfolio.