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MOLES AND RATS

Who Is Trump’s Mole? Here Are The Top Suspects

Dash MacIntyre
4 min readAug 14, 2022
(Official White House Photo by Shealah Craighead listed as Public Domain CC 1.0)

The specific knowledge the FBI seemed to possess about the top secret documents Donald Trump was hiding at Mar-a-Lago suggests someone close to him flipped and became a mole for federal investigators.

Who was the mole? These are the most likely suspects!

Jared Kushner: Jared is perhaps the funniest potential mole. It’s quite suspicious that he was given $2 billion to invest from Mohammed bin Salman against the recommendations of advisers for the Saudi Arabian foreign wealth fund. Donald Trump usually gets very upset when he feels that people are profiting off of him and not giving him a cut, so it begs the question of whether or not some of Jared’s $2 billion was meant for Donald. Maybe Jared is betraying his father-in-law to keep that money all for himself?

There’s also the matter of Trump’s unusual publicly admitted sexual interest in his daughter, so perhaps Jared is also sidelining his biggest romantic rival.

Mark Meadows: Meadows is a weak, little man, and likely has drastically more obvious criminal exposure to many of Trump’s alleged crimes because he was the chief-of-staff through who most political communications traveled on their way to Trump. Whereas Trump has a mob boss instinct to not keep a paper trail, Meadows turned over thousands of documents to the January 6th Committee before he started flip-flopping on his interest in cooperating. This gives him expansive exposure to having accidentally incriminated himself or committed perjury, particularly with the election fraud effort to pass on fake slates of electors, for which he was a point man coordinating between members of Congress, the White House, and even Fox News hosts.

It has been reported that Trump is being warned to stop communicating with Meadows, so the suspicion that he has flipped is high.

Rudy Giuliani: Rudy has disgraced his legacy as “America’s Mayor,” lost his law license, disgraced himself with a plethora of embarrassing shames (the Four Seasons parking lot incident, getting caught by Borat with his hands in his pants, the hair dye streak, and doing a bunch of media appearances visibly drunk), and participated in many of Trump’s January 6th and election fraud schemes. He’s also being…

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Dash MacIntyre
Dash MacIntyre

Written by Dash MacIntyre

Dash MacIntyre's writing studio of Dadaist graffiti news comedy, and other creative writings. Subscribe. Satire is cathartic in fascist eras.

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