The Christmas Content At Fox News Has Gotten Real Weird

The Culture War is entering another “War On Christmas” season

Dash MacIntyre
3 min readNov 29, 2023

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Photo by Roberto Nickson on Unsplash
  • What If Democrats Had Aborted Jesus? A dramatic imagining of our Founding Fathers as Muslim terrorists, featuring El Binyamin Franklin, Tamam al-Jefferson, and Ghasan Washington, the first caliph of al-Ameriqaeda
  • Even Hitler Didn’t Blitzkrieg Christmas Like Democrats Have: a Laura Ingraham production featuring a “liberal Santa,” who has divorced Mrs. Claus to be gay with the elves, dyed his hair purple, and taken up the drinking of children’s blood
  • Globalism Vs The Messiah: a conspiratorial documentary alleging that George Soros’s long ago ancestors paid Pontius Pilate to kill Jesus, only Jesus didn’t die, and had kids in a direct family line that led many generations later to Donald Trump
  • God’s Chosen President: a propaganda film in North Korean style that claims Donald Trump was virgin-birthed, only golfs holes-in-one, and he does not pee or poop
  • How To Keep Your Testicles Tan Throughout The Dark Winter: a Tucker Carlson production advertising his new Tucker’s Testes 2.0 testicle tanning machines, which retail for $199.99
  • A Libertarian Christmas Carol: a remake where several ghosts visit Tiny Tim on Christmas Eve and…

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Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.