Trump’s Next Batch Of Trading Card NFTs Go On Sale Tomorrow

Dash MacIntyre
4 min readJun 1, 2024
Photo by Jp Valery on Unsplash

Donald Trump’s latest money laundering scheme, or rather once-in-a-lifetime investment opportunity, of NFT trading cards made him so much money to pay off his obscene personal debts and lawyer fees, he’s bringing them back for a second batch!

This batch continues the first batch’s comic book hero themes, but it adds his fellow Republican presidential primary opponents as his enemies in a manner criticized by many across the whole political spectrum as stupid, bigoted, and certainly juvenile.

The following are all stock descriptions of some of Trump’s NFTs about to be unveiled tomorrow:

  • Nikki Haley wearing a sari and being strangled by a snake Trump is controlling with a flute
  • Trump as a ghost that looks suspiciously Klan-esque scaring Tim Scott into a heart attack
  • Trump choking Vivek Ramaswamy with a computer cord in the Metaverse
  • Ramaswamy wearing a turban and being strangled by a snake Trump is controlling with a flute
  • Trump riding in a hot air balloon made out of Chris Christie
  • Trump cheering on a crowd hanging Mike Pence in front of Congress
  • Trump shoving Election 2020’s electoral votes down Pence’s throat

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Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.