Member-only story

ADMISSION OF GUILT?

Trump Says His Campaign Cheated Way Too Much For Biden To Have Won Fairly

Dash MacIntyre
3 min readMar 2, 2023
(Official White House photo by Shealah Craighead | Public Domain CC 1.0)

Donald Trump is again alleging fraud in his election loss, but has a novel rationale for his loss that he explained in two Truths he posted today on his social media app Truth Social:

“I know for a fact that Democrats cheated, and it’s because we Republicans snuck in a whole lot of fraudulent votes ourselves (to test the system!). There’s no way Joe Biden got 81 million votes! So if the media counts Biden’s fake votes, they have to count my fake votes, too! I had my team print tens of thousands of extra votes in each of the swing states (just in case!) so Georgia, Arizona, Wisconsin, and Pennsylvania all have to take enough for me to win! I demand they make me the winner because none of the math in the swing states add up! There’s no way Georgia could have gone blue! We threw tens of thousands of the Blacks off the voter rolls, passed unnecessarily difficult voter ID laws, made sure the lines in Black communities were 8 hours, outlawed giving food or water to voters in line, and even got Kanye to run as a distraction, so either Democrats cheated, or Governor Kemp is being paid by Hillary Clinton and George Soros to betray the best president America has ever had: ME!”

--

--

Dash MacIntyre
Dash MacIntyre

Written by Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.

Responses (3)