“The Party Not Taken,” A Poem By Donald Trump

Trump has our foremost literary mind among presidents.

(Official White House photo by Joyce N. Boghosian | Public Domain CC 1.0)

Who knew Donald Trump had a poetic side? He wrote this retrospective poem in his introspective free time:

The Party Not Taken, by Donald J. Trump

Two parties diverged looking for candidates that were good

And sorry I could not win the nomination of both

And be one businessman, long I stood

And thought of Democrats as much as I could

and if its voters were gullible for a populist oath;

Then took the other party, a little bit dumb,

And having perhaps a little less brains,

Conspiratorial, and envying my income;

Though as for what the red team’s become

’Twas easier to pretend to feel their pains.

And all that year in their hearts did I trod,

I left no bigotry unplucked or ignored.

Conquered my foes with my alpha facade

Yet despite Jeb’s low energy — they would not applaud —

I doubted I’d ever be the White House landlord!

I shall be telling this story…