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Republican-Approved Remakes Of Famous Disney Movies

These ideas for Disney movies are 100% guaranteed to get the liberal tears flowing!

Dash MacIntyre
3 min readMar 3, 2023

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Credit: Gage Skidmore | gageskidmore.com | via Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)
  • Beauty and the Beast: after getting married, the Beast locks Belle barefoot in the kitchen, and takes away all her books because they’re too liberal and woke.
  • The Lion King: Simba trashes his father’s legacy as a just ruler because his dad was a total beta cuck. Simba knows Scar was a much smarter, more respected ruler, so Simba announces he’s going to Make the Pride Great Again by allying with the hyenas because the hyena military doesn’t let in gays or females.
  • Cinderella: Cinderella is kept from going out and having a social life because her good Christian stepmom knows she’s a little floozie who will have premarital sex and weekly abortions. When the Prince goes door to door to meet the kingdom’s single maidens, Cinderella’s father gives the Prince the symbolic key to her virginity, and warns the Prince that Cinderella has read too many feminist books so she’ll need an occasional physical reminder that the Bible says women must be subservient to men at all times.
  • Alice in Wonderland: Alice gets arrested for having edible drugs, and President Donald Trump’s new execution policy for…

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Dash MacIntyre
Dash MacIntyre

Written by Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.

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