NOAA Says It’ll Begin Naming Hurricanes After GOP Climate Deniers

And this week’s other Dada News headlines!

Dash MacIntyre

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Photo by NASA on Unsplash
  • NOAA has reportedly renamed Hurricane Milton as “Hurricane Republicans Are Fucking Climate-Denying, Science-Ignorant, Florida-Killing, Militantly Belligerent, 30-Year Idiots.”
  • Leaked private texts from JD Vance reportedly show him complaining about campaigning with Donald Trump because of Trump’s “expired roast beef stench.”
  • NASA just confirmed that the James Webb Space Telescope has finished scanning the entire visible cosmos and can confidently confirm that Donald Trump is still the whiniest little bitch in the entire universe.
  • Donald Trump reportedly just interrupted a wedding reception at Mar-a-Lago for a half hour to rant about how people leave Kamala Harris’s rallies early, not his, and then he got visibly upset when wedding guests started leaving the room.
  • Donald Trump audibly farted on Laura Loomer today at Mar-a-Lago.
  • Kamala Harris is reportedly hosting a “Windmills for Kamala” themed event tonight.
  • A liberal billionaire is reportedly paying for a dozen Haitian immigrants to get an annual membership to Mar-a-Lago.
  • The State of New York says if Trump doesn’t pay his legal fines…

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Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.