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Mike Pompeo Is Now Using Orange Makeup Like Donald Trump

Pompeo is taking sycophancy to a whole new level.

Dash MacIntyre
4 min readOct 22, 2022

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Credit (modified): Gage Skidmore | gageskidmore.com| via Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)

In an act of solidarity with President Trump, Secretary of State Mike Pompeo has begun using the orange foundation that Trump favors.

“With a healthy tan glow, President Donald Trump and I made America respected around the world again,” said Pompeo in a press conference this morning. “Our totally natural faces reflected the youthful vitality and vigor of America, and no one laughed at us during the alpha-male Trump presidency like they used to laugh at us under Obama’s presidency and now Biden’s presidency. Trump and I were no beta pansy men!”

A CNN reporter then pointed out Pompeo was obviously wearing makeup.

“What makeup are you referring to?” Pompeo asked. “See, this is why we call CNN ‘fake news.’ I went golfing with the President at Mar-a-Lago yesterday, and it was sunny outside so I tanned a bit. I take offense that you would insinuate the President wears makeup. The color of the President’s face is not different than the rest of his body. In fact, when we were done golfing, we hit the showers and, while discussing totally harmless locker room talk about grabbing women from their crotches, I could see that the President’s facial skin color…

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Dash MacIntyre
Dash MacIntyre

Written by Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.

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