MAGA Fans Are Annoyed When The Brown People They Yell At Turn Out To Be Citizens
Bertha LaFollette, 49, a local Alabama woman, has been pausing in the middle of her daily errands to yell at the non-white people she encounters, but she keeps getting discouraged by finding out the people she harasses in public are, in fact, US citizens.
“I know from Fox News the illegal MS-13 gang lords and immigrant terrorists are out here all around, but they’re too shadowy and I can’t find any,” she explained. “This morning I yelled at a 50-something-year-old Asian man to go back to China, and — what do you know? — he turned out to be a 25-year veteran of the navy who has lived here in Alabama his whole life. This other Black thug I saw was reading a book in the park, so, of course, I did the patriotic thing and told him he wasn’t welcome in Mobile, and I got unlucky again! He turned out to be the mayor! What are the odds? Things are so out of control. I don’t know how he could have been democratically elected! This just isn’t my Mobile anymore! Yet all around the country are horrible stories! I hear from Sean Hannity and Tucker Carlson on a nightly basis how animalistic minorities are out everywhere targeting Trump supporters and stopping at nothing to persecute us Christian whites, but just my luck that I can’t find any of them to yell at here! Maybe I should move. I must be in the only town in America…
