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EXCUSES, EXCUSES

Ivanka: “Every Time My Father Broke Any Laws, I Was In Another Room Creating Jobs For Women”

Dash MacIntyre
3 min readDec 4, 2022
Credit: Gage Skidmore | gageskidmore.com | (cropped) via Flickr (CC BY-SA 2.0)

Ivanka Trump has spoken out publicly about her father’s plethora of criminal investigations for the first time.

She offered a brief statement to the press in which she claimed total innocence of any wrongdoing in all the federal, Florida, New York, and Georgia investigations into her father’s finances, business practices, and presidential conduct.

“Every time my father ever discussed Ukraine aid, or President Zelensky, or Georgia finding 11,780 votes,” Ivanka said, “or extortion, or witness intimidation, or bribery, or Stormy Daniels, or obstruction of the Mueller investigation, or obstruction of Congress, or obstruction of justice, or collusion with Russia, or collusion with Saudi Arabia, or collusion with Israel, or emoluments clause violations, or lying about the murder of Jamal Khashoggi, or betraying the Kurds, or charity fraud, or stock fraud, or money laundering, or the migrant cages at the border, or losing migrant children to possible sex trafficking, or university fraud, or illegal nondisclosure agreements, or hush money payments, or campaign finance violations, or incitement of violence, or inspiring incels and neo-Nazis, or giving out undeserved security clearances, or nepotistic choices in…

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Dash MacIntyre
Dash MacIntyre

Written by Dash MacIntyre

Comedian, political satirist, and poet. Created The Halfway Post. Check out my comedy book Satire In The Trump Years, and my poetry book Cabaret No Stare.

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