SCHOLASTIC REJECTS

House Republicans Want To Ban The Following Subjects In Schools

The GOP wants everyone to be in their poorly-educated base by banning books and school subjects.

Photo by MChe Lee on Unsplash

Republicans want to ban all these subjects in schools:

• Martin Luther King Jr., Malcolm X, Rosa Parks, Frederick Douglass, Steve Urkel, and Cedric The Entertainer
• Math (too Asian, too hard, and too based on Arabic numerals)
• Science (too liberal and too elitist because evolution and climate change are easier to think about by not thinking about them)
• Civics (too obsessed with democracy, globalist-inspired rules, and infringements on anarchic-libertarian freedom)
• Women’s studies (too female and a threat to the patriarchy)
• Reading (too homosexual and too liberal)
• Personal hygiene (too homosexual and liberal)
• Sex-ed (students should stay entirely celibate until marriage with the possible exception of allowing students to adopt the Mormon practice of armpit sex)
• Driving (for female students, male students can still learn)
• Black Santa Claus, Black Jesus, any depiction of the…