Donald Trump Is Now Selling Timeshares At Mar-A-Lago

Former President Donald Trump just launched a new company called Trump Vacations to sell timeshare memberships at his various Trump-branded hotels and golf courses.

Mr. Trump has reportedly already begun pitching timeshare contracts to his Mar-a-Lago guests, and even subjected a recent Republican National Committee meeting of top GOP party officials to a three-hour presentation led by him and his adult children, Don Jr., Ivanka, and Eric.

According to sources who attended the meeting, Donald Trump led off the presentation with a slideshow of pictures of women in bikinis, and he claimed to the gathered RNC officials that sexy, young women, and men, “couldn’t resist” the allure of a Trump Vacations member, and that paying for the Trump Vacations “Platinum Level” membership was guaranteed to quadruple your sex life, and halve the age of your sexual partners. At the end of the slideshow was a picture of Ivanka in a bikini, and Trump paused on it staring without saying a word for an amount of time several attendees said afterwards was “uncomfortably long, particularly because it was his daughter.”

Ivanka hosted the second segment of the presentation, and showed off the various Ivanka-branded amenities available at every Trump Vacations property, including Ivanka Saunas™️, Ivanka Massage Chairs™️, Ivanka…